


Tales of Treasures Lost

by parkahhhh



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Allen getting on Alfred's nerves, Alternate Universe, Archaeology, Damn I'm bad at these, I do my research (sometimes), Multi, Why not make the dudes archaeologists, hetalia AU, slight usuk, this is shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-06-23
Packaged: 2018-07-16 18:43:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7280326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parkahhhh/pseuds/parkahhhh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of works about the archeological adventures of Alfred F. Jones, Matthew Williams, and many more. Taken from my Quotev account, AwkwardTinyDino. I will add more tags and characters as I go along.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tales of Treasures Lost

Alfred F. Jones looked down at the letter with a small smile. His good friend ((cough cough boyfriend cough cough)) ,Arthur Kirkland, had sent it to him. It was a tip on his next giant archaeological discovery. The letter was written in Arthur’s recognizable scrawl:

Dear Alfred,

I have found some information about a archaeological quest, and I thought you would be interested. The artifact is called “The Acacia Sultan”. I would go myself, but Yao drained by bank account trying to find that temple last year. So, I am putting the pressure on you to get the job done. There should be another piece of paper in the envelope with the coordinates of the find. You can thank me by giving me ¼ of the money you get from whatever museum you decide to donate the artifact to. You have to be there in at least a week. You will be able to tell if that is the correct artifact if the Sultan’s mother’s name is engraved on the bottom, since their society was matrilineal.

Sincerely,

Arthur

He couldn't be more specific, thought Al sarcastically. He picked up the envelope from his desk. He opened it, but to his surprise, there was no coordinates to the spot where the treasure was. Al decided he could only do one thing- call Arthur. “But I don't wannaaaaa.” he said to himself. “Fine. I don't remember his number, though. I could ask Matthew...”

Alfred got up off of his lazy butt and went to his brother Matthew’s room. He burst into the room, like the extremely loud man he is, which caused Mattie to fall off of his chair. “Alfred! You scared me! I thought I told you to warn me when you want to talk!” yelled his usually quiet brother. “Sorry, dude, but do you remember Arthur’s number?” Al asked. “Yeah, but don't you have it in the phone book?” Matt responded. Al rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. “I spilled coffee on it.” Matt shook his head, and muttered, “Great, more work for me to do.”

“Here. This should be correct.” Matt wrote a number down on a spare piece of paper, and handed it to Al. “Good luck. Hopefully he’s in a good mood.” Alfred just looked at his brother. “Dude, he’s never in a good mood.” He then proceed to leave the room. “Now, I have to start rewriting that phone book.” Matt said to himself.

Alfred went to the phone on the wall, and typed in Arthur’s number. It rang for a bit, but finally was answered. “Hello?” said a groggy voice from the other end of the line. “‘Hey, dude! It’s Al.” “Of course it is. Who else would have the audacity to call me at 6:00 in the morning?” the grumpy Brit answered. “Sorry dude. I didn't realize. Anyway, what was the coordinates to that find? I didn't see the paper.” answered Al. “Fine. Hold on a moment.” He heard some random noise, and some rustling of papers. A few moments later, Arthur was back on the line. “Okay, here they are. Las Khorey, Somalia. There, a caravan of griots will take you to the site. I’ve already arranged the plans, so all you have to do is find them and tell them your name. That easy enough for you, or do I have to send someone with you?” explained Arthur. Alfred laughed, “Well, a little backup would be great. You know anyone?” “Well, You could take your brother for once. I mean, he was sick all of the other times.” Arthur suggested. “Sure. Welp, see ya!” Al said, and hung up.

“Hey, Mattie!” Alfred yelled from the kitchen, where the phone was. He heard a door open and close and some soft footsteps. “Yes?” the quiet Canadian asked when he entered the room. “Do you wanna go to Somalia with me? Arthur tipped me off about a site there, and I thought you would want to come, since you haven't been able to come the last few times.” inquired Al. The blond looked quite surprised, and answered, “Really? I can come?” “Yeah, if you want to.” replied his brother. “Of course I’ll come! I have to start packing, and I need to get all the information I can about… What are we going to dig up?” the Canadian inquired. “It’s this statue thing called the “Acacia Sultan”. Apparently, it's a really important artifact to the Somali culture, so we are gonna get paid a lot of cash to dig this up. Woo! Money!” explained Al enthusiastically. “Since you obviously don't know a lot about the subject, I need to start research. Can you start making the travel plans?” Matt responded. “Of course, dude! Las Khorey, Here we come!”

 

~~Time Skip Brought to You By..... Mattie's syrup-smothered pancakes!!~~

 

The two brothers were at an airport near New York, trying to catch their flight to Bosaso, where they will take a bus to Las Khorey. The two finally found their departure gate, after a long struggle with crowds and Al’s restless craving for hamburgers. Thankfully, the flight attendant had just started to call out which classes are going to board next. “Business class, please begin to walk in an orderly fashion through the gate. Thank you, and have a nice flight.” the almost monotone flight attendant repeated. Well, someone’s having a good time, thought Al. He and Matt picked up their bags, and walked through the gate. The blonds hurried to their seats, not wanting to be caught up in the flood of people once again.

“Okay, Al, now that we’ve settled down and you’ve eaten that hamburger, let's get busy.” Matt said. “Dude! Airplane trips are for sleeping! Not for education!” complained Al. “Al, you need to have some information on the artifact, or else you’ll look like an idiot with a shovel.” insisted the Canadian. “Fine.” Al said. “So, the little figurine thing is of the first sultan of the Warsangali Sultanate, which capital was in Las Khorey, the city we are heading to. The Somali are famous for their wooden statues, so of course they are going make one of the first sultan of a giant sultanate.” Matt explained. “Well, that’s good to know. Can I take a nap now?” asked Al. “Yeah. I’ll wake you up when the food gets here.” “Great.”

A few hours later, in Bender Qassim International Airport

 

The two were waiting at the front of the airport for their bus to Las Khorey. “Do you know when the bus is supposed to be arriving?” Mattie asked Al. He looked at his watch and answered, “15 minutes ago.” Al sighed. They both groaned impatiently. Just moments later, a blue, rickety bus pulled up in front of them. The door opened, and a figure asked, “Are you two Matthew Williams and Alfred F. Jones?” they asked. The two brothers nodded their heads. The person came into the light, and it was none other than....

“Hey, porkchop.” Allen Jones greeted as he smirked at Al. “Noooo! Why are you here?! You're supposed to be visiting mom in Plymouth!” “That was a year ago, man. Now, I’m a commercial bus driver, for the time being.” answered the brunet. “Hey, Allen.” said Matt quietly. “Hey, pancake. Long time no see!” said Allen. “Can we take a different bus?” whispered Al to Matt. “Hey, you booked it.” Mattie whispered back. “Get on the bus, you two! I have places to go, people to see.” said Allen impatiently. What people? thought Al.

On the way to Las Khorey, Allen would not shut his face. Al was literally turning red from anger and annoyance. Matt, on the other hand, was silently cracking up from laughter. Could you blame him? His brother, who was usually compared to a 1920’s movie star, was as red as a tomato. His cheeks were puffed up like a chipmunk! It went on like that for the rest of the trip. Allen told embarrassing stories, Al yelled at him, and Matt cracked up. Finally, after a bunch of anger and humiliating stories, they finally arrived at the former capital of the Warsangali Sultanate. As soon as the vehicle came to a stop, the two brothers grabbed their bags, and practically ran off of the bus. “Hey! You didn't pay me!” Allen yelled after them. “Well, I know who isn't getting a birthday card from me this year.”

The two blonds slowed their pace, and walked to the hotel where the caravan would pick them up. “Is that them?” Al said as he pointed to a group of people dressed in traditional griot clothing. “No, it so isn't.” said Matt sarcastically. Al rolled his eyes, and walked over to them. “Are you the people who are taking us too the site?” he questioned. “That depends.” said a man with a thick accent. “Who are you?” “I’m Alfred Jones, and this is my brother, Matthew Williams.” he said. Matt smiled, and the man said, “Good. Follow me. You can just leave your bags here, my friends will take them to your room.” They sat their luggage down, save Al’s leather satchel and Matt’s backpack. The griot led them to an old Jeep, and gestured for them to get into it. The both climbed in the back of the car, and the man turned on the engine. they started their drive to the archaeological site. “I hope Ivan isn't there. After Allen, I don't think I can take much more ridicule.” Matt just nodded in reply. Minutes later, they arrived at the plateau where the artifact was located. They got out of the car and walked towards the site.

A large hole was dug in the side of the land form. People swarmed in and out, trying to stabilize the tunnel before the brothers made their way in. The griot walked over to a one of the supervisors, and talked to them in Somali. The two brothers walked around, taking in the environment. The griot called them back over, and they reluctantly went.

“Do you have gear of your own?” asked the supervisor. “Yeah, it’s in my brother’s backpack.” answered Al. The man nodded, and told them they could start exploring the cave and looking for the artifact. They walked towards the opening. “You ready?” Al asked Matt. Matt stared at the dark man-made cave, and nodded. Matt reached for his flashlight, and turned it on. The two walked into the dark, not knowing that they wouldn't come into the light until a day later.

“God, it's creepy in here.” said Al. “Haven't you dealt with this before?” joked Matt. “Well, yeah, but it's still creepy! You try unearthing a 2,000 year old mummy with a spider crawling up your leg!” responded the American. Matt laughed.  
“How about we split up? It would cover more land.” suggested Al. “I thought you were too scared to go alone?” Matt said. Al stuck his tongue and said,“No, but seriously. We should.” “Really?” “I’ll go this way, you go that way.” Al said as he walked to a different path. “‘Kay.” Mattie responded as he walked in the other direction.  
Al pulled out his extra flashlight and switched it on. He began to explore the tunnel that the excavation team had dug into, and where they believed that the Sultan was located. “You know, I really wish sometimes that ancient peoples had electricity. That would be fantastic.” Al said to himself. He looked at the walls of the temple for any clues to where the artifact would be hiding. Some words were written in Swahili, some in Bantu, and some in Somali. “Well, this is why I should have taken that class on African Languages. Gosh-diddly darn.” Al muttered. He ran his hand across the wall, since the flashlight wasn't that successful at it’s job.  
He came to two doors at the end of the long hallway. The seal holding them together looked a lot like the one used on King Tut’s tomb. Then, he heard a whoosh. He turned around, only to see a arrow flying towards him at high speeds.

Meanwhile, Matt had lost his shoe to a battle with a puddle of mud, and his flashlight had ran out of battery. Fantastic, he thought. “Why did I agree to split up?” He said, annoyed. “It’s a good idea, he said, It will cover more land, he said. This is the last time I listen to his stupid ideas.” He said in a mocking tone. He heard a high-pitched screech, coming from somewhere close. “I'd know that screech anywhere.” Matt muttered. “Alfred!” He yelled out to his brother. He followed where the scream had come from, and found his brother huddled on the floor like a scared golden retriever puppy.

“Alfred! Are you okay?” Matt worriedly asked him. “Y-Yeah, I'm fine, dude.” Alfred stood up, and said, “Nothing could scare a hero like me!” He said, and Matt face palmed. Alfred calmed down a little bit, and asked, “Could you help me break this seal? I wanna see if the artifact is in here.” “Sure. The cable cutters are in my backpack.” Matt requested as he turned so his back faced Al. Al reached into the backpack, and pulled out the items. He went over to the seal, but before he cut it, he said, “Do you wanna get a picture of the seal before I break it?” Matt nodded in response, and pulled his camera fro the backpack. He kneeled down, and snapped a photo of the seal. Then, Al placed the cutters on the ancient rope, and snapped.

They pushed open the door, and went inside. Alfred turned on his flashlight again, and the two looked around. “Wow.” Matt said. There was ancient writings and murals about human migration on the walls, and antediluvian currencies were lying in piles on the floor. Al spotted something in the middle of the room. There was the thing they had came here for- the Acacia Sultan. Al picked it up before Matt could stop him, since they did not know if it was booby-trapped.

Suddenly, a noise came from the ceiling of the room. The brothers looked up, only to see pieces of the ceiling falling down around them, and the door slowly sliding shut. The brothers looked at each other with wide eyes, and ran towards the door. Thankfully, they had both made it out in time.

Al looked at Matt with a goofy smile on his face. “Well, that was scary.” He joked. Matt stared at him, and whispered, “Why did I agree to this? Why?” Al started to laugh, and slowly, so did his brother. “Can we go now?” The Canadian asked. “Sure dude.” Al answered, and they walked away from the room.

A few minutes later, the reached the opening that they had come in through. Alfred and Matt squinted their eyes from the sudden bright light. Through his squinched eyes, he saw a medium-sized figure walking toward him. “You wanker!” the figure said. “Artie!” Al happily yelled. “Don’t “Artie” me! You both were down there for 3 days! Do you know how worried I was? You better be glad that I love you, or else I would probably kill you right now!” Arthur fumed. Alfred simply placed a sloppy kiss on his cheek, and then responded, “3 days? Really? Hey, that’s a new record, dude! High five!” and then proceeded to high-five Matt. Arthur sighed in annoyance. “Well, as long as you're alright, I guess I can let the matter drop. You both are alright, correct?”

“I lost a shoe to a mud puddle.” Matt said meekly. “I almost got killed by a ceiling!” said Al excitedly. “Those are all to be expected. Did you find the artifact?” “We sure did! Mattie, show it to him!” Al exclaimed. “I thought you had it.” confessed Matthew. Al turned to Matt with a worried expression. “We forgot the Sultan!” he squealed. “Hehe… Looks like we're going to have to go back in, Artie! See ya!” he laughed, and the two brothers bolted back into the cavern, leaving a stuttering Englishman in the dust. “Idiots!” he scoffed. He walked back towards the tent. “I need some rum…” Arthur muttered as he slouched back towards the tent.

**Author's Note:**

> Yay! You got through the shit I call writing! What did ya think of my first fic on Ao3? I just had to put USUK in there. It's one of my only weaknesses, besides tree nuts and Bucky Barnes. Now you all know how to kill me. Great. Well, see ya next time, cagnas!


End file.
